Feature for @weareunwstd IG
I started my sober journey on July 9th 2019, the day after my 28th Birthday. I had been struggling with demons for far too long and I knew that I needed to cut out the booze so I could focus on my mental health and healing my past traumas.
Being a musician, drinking and partying is almost built into the job description- especially living in Los Angeles, CA.
Pair that with being an Aussie and I almost felt it gave me license to escape my reality on a regular basis.
When people saw me taking a shot to celebrate a killer gig, or ordering another margarita they thought I was having the time of my life.
Little did they know I was just trying to escape the feelings that were constantly threatening to overwhelm me almost daily.
I didn't want to be that person anymore. I wanted to feel good about myself, be proud of myself- not constantly be sad and hating myself.
So I got sober. And almost instantly, my life changed for the better.
I am always surrounded by people drinking due to the nature of my profession and it isn't something that has bothered me.
I have some incredible sober friends in my inner circle which helps.
I am not a fan of obscenely drunk people though, so I do try and avoid places/events where the sole purpose is to get wasted.
That just seems boring to me.
The most difficult thing about sobriety, aside from having to actually face my emotions head on, is the reaction from strangers.
If I had a $ for how many times I have been asked if I'm an addict or "Did something bad happen? Can you tell us about it" by people I have just met, I'd be rich.
I also find people who minimise my experience or disrespect my choice one of the hardest parts.
We've all heard the "Oh but I didn't drink for *insert time period here* and it was easy!
f you are scared to stop drinking because you're afraid you'll lose friends or a social life A) they're not your real friends anyway if that would be their reaction. 😎 There are so many more fulfilling and fun things to do in life than sit in a dingy bar getting wasted and waking up the next morning with the hangover from hell. And the money you will save! You'll get to travel more, attend more concerts, buy more books/clothes/whatever you love AND you will have true and genuine friendships that will last a lifetime. Rather than a cast of ever revolving faces who don't actually care about you.
At 18 month sober, I can't even believe how much my life has changed and how much I have changed as an individual in ways I cannot even imagine.
I am constantly in a state of serenity, I very rarely struggle with my depression. Of course, I do have bad days or weeks (don't we all?) but I now have coping strategies to deal with them better.
I have a better relationship with my family and friends, I am succeeding in my career Internationally and I genuinely love myself.
It doesn't get much better than that for me x